Several thoughts have occurred to me since my last blog. First, I would like to discuss the ever-interesting “how you know when a guy likes you.” Let me tell you that the following things mean NOTHING in real life:
- When he texts you every day just to ask “What’s up?”
- When he tells you all his secrets
- When he teases you constantly
- When he gives you a play-by-play of his entire vaction via text message
You heard me right, girls. That shit means NOTHING! Your best bet is to just ask, “Do you like me?” I swear, that is the only way you will EVER know for sure, so leave behind the delusion that guys give hints. They don’t. That only happens in Seventeen magazine and movies. So get with reality and just ask. It’s hard as hell, but that’s the only way to do it.
So, another thought that occurred to me… when you dishonor your body, you dishonor God. Why do I say this? For a number of reasons, really. First off, God lives inside of you. He is EVERYWHERE you are. He exists with you and apart from you at the same time. Secondly, God gave you this amazing body with the ability to do wonderful things (just look at DNA… how beautiful is that?!). He expects you to treat it well and put good things on and inside of it. When you put things like drugs and alcohol in your body, you only hurt it. So in a way, you also hurt God by insulting His hard work and masterpiece that is your body. You are not alive so that you can destroy your brain cells or your liver. You are not alive so that you can eat greasy, processed foods instead of good, healthy foods. You are alive so that you can interact with others, help others, and get help FROM others. You are alive to live a good life and be with others, in harmony with God.
I would like to stress the fact that that was not meant to piss anyone off. Yes, I was writing from a Christian view; but this is my blog, the blog of a Christian girl. But if you think about it, isn’t treating your body well a good philosophy, regardless of your belief system? I think that the main point is that you respect what you’re walking around in, no matter who or what you do it for. So in conclusion, you only get one body (unless you believe in reincarnation), so treat it well. Live well and the good things you do will come back to you. =)
That’s a short couplet written by Dorothy Parker, just so you know (give credit where credit is due, young children). That couplet is very short, but it says so much. It is a testament to the superficiality of America. Not only do men rarely pay attention to girls with glasses, they also tend to glide over such women who are overweight and not conventionally beautiful. Show a man a picture of Lindsay Lohan and a picture of Queen Latifah, and that man will pick Lindsay. Both women have pretty faces, but one is skinny and the other is fat. Men don’t like women who are overweight, and they don’t like women who choose to not spend 2 hours getting ready each day.
So what if I need to lose about 20 lbs? So what if it only takes me 30 minutes to get ready, even to go out somewhere nice? And who really gives a shit about my glasses? I am still intelligent, I am still loyal, and I am better for you than any skinny, pretty, empty-headed bombshell will ever be. No, I don’t look like a model; but you’re not going to end up GETTING a model in the end. What you’ll want after all is said and done is a woman you can converse intelligently with, a woman who will understand you and be your partner. Eventually, all men learn that this is what they should have wanted all along. But here we are, the intelligent and overweight women of the world, waiting for these idiots to come to that realization. Why should we have to go without a date on Friday nights because we wear a size 16+?
I am fucking tired of guys and their superficial ways. Even the guys that claim to hate the superficiality of society are just as shallow as the jerks they claim not to be. I venture to say that there are no men who “care about what’s on the inside more than what’s on the outside.” Men are visual creatures who need that type of stimulation. It’s biology, it’s unable to be altered. So where does that leave girls like me who are 20+ lbs. overweight? I suppose we are simply doomed to be seen as undesirable creatures that will only ever be “one of the guys” or “my sister from another mother.” In this life, in this country, in this culture, looks are everything; and if you can’t measure up, you’re out.
In my child & family studies class today, we talked about how the baby boomer generation is so much larger than mine. The professor told us that we would be the ones supporting their social security, medicare, and other government programs that they will be relying on. She also said that the BB’s started turning sixty either this year or last year. And there are a lot more who haven’t turned 60 but they will really soon! The mood of the class became rather Orwellian, as she introduced the possibility of the government systematically euthanizing that generation in the coming years to free up resources. I personally do not agree with this at all (unless they WANT to be euthanized, but I doubt they do..LOL); but I can see the logic in it. It’s a cold and cruel logic, but it is logic nonetheless. If only Orwell had thought to include this in 1984, eh? Maybe someone should write 2040. LOL Sadly, that was about the most interesting thing that happened to me all day… that class. Other than that, it was utterly bland.
In more personal news, I am finding now that I need balance. During the past month or so, I have come to this realization. I am a very neurotic person; there isn’t one moment in my daily life that I’m not slightly or majorly worrying over something. Do I consider this a fault? No - it’s just part of my personality. But I wish I were able to have a little piece of calm. Whether or not I find that serenity in a friend or something more, doesn’t matter really. But I feel like God is going to give me balance someday soon. My life is changing; and I really think it is changing for the better, in spite of all that is going on in my life. (If you have access to my WordPress blog, then you will know exactly what’s going on in my life once I post there after this.) But I feel like something is about to happen, and I am just waiting for it - even though I have no clue as to what it is. God is the ultimate miracle-worker, and He has something in store for me. 
Speaking of God and other such matters, whoever decided that everything was always black and white? I don’t see how anyone could view the world as anything but a grey area, morally speaking. I mean, sure there’s a difference between right and wrong; but sometimes the two are different for everyone. Sometimes, what was the right thing to do a month ago is the completely WRONG thing to do now. And sometimes we don’t all fit into the world. Everyone is the odd one out at some point. It’s all a grey area, and that’s why we need God to help us navigate it. God created us all different, with unique ways of needing the same things. The only thing that is outside of the grey area is God Himself - that’s why He can help us get through it. =)
If you’re ever on the customer side of things at a pharmacy, PLEASE refrain from doing the following:
1. Coming in 5-15 minutes before closing time with no less than 4 prescriptions, expecting us to fill it
2. Assuming you know more than I do about my job
3. Continuing to say I shorted you some hydrocodone, even after I tell you that I filled it for exactly what the doctor wrote it for, AND I read you exactly what he/she wrote on the scrip
4. Telling me I should look in the “T” section of the bin right after you told me your last name, which is “Turner” (I am not stupid, believe it or not.)
5. Pronouncing “generics” like “gerianetics”
6. Trying to get your Xanax filled 15 days early, when you were giving a thirty day supply
7. Buying anything with pseudoephedrine in it - I am tired of filling out that damn logbook!
8. Handing me a prescription for Oxycontin that has been torn and spat on in several places (There’s no way in hell any pharmacy would take it if it looks like that!)
9. Getting to the pharmacy before I do and standing there while I open things up, with an impatient look on your face
10. Groaning and/or rolling your eyes when I tell you there’s a 20 minute wait - why don’t you just head on over to Walmart, Walgreens, or CVS where the wait is at least 30 minutes longer than ours?
11. Keeping me on the phone for 15 minutes or longer by making me price 7 medications for you - get up off your lazy ass and bring the scrips in yourself!
12. Talking more slowly than molasses oozes when you call the pharmacy
13. Expecting me to be nice to you when you roll in 5 minutes before close (see #1)
As you can tell, work was hell today. Ten hours of absolute crap! It was either so slow I could have flown to Paris and back or so busy I wanted to hang myself with the phone cord. There was never a steady flow of anything except sorrow and disgruntlement (is that a word?). Also, I just really, REALLY hate customers. Customers are the most inconsiderate and laziest people on the face of the planet. And you have to wonder HOW they can have service jobs when they’re all such assholes! Feel free to complain about your own job in the comments. Sometimes we all just need a little rant. 
I just watched Fast Food Nation, and I am now taking my “I don’t eat fast food anymore” thing to a whole new level. I dare say I’ll never eat ANY hamburger from ANY place ever again. I am so through with it all. 
